At last a guy has taken the time to write this all down (终于有一个家伙肯花时间把下面这些写下来了）
Finally , the guys’ side of the story.( I must admit, it’s pretty good.)We always hear ” the rules”
From the female side….（我们总听到从女人角度说起的“规矩”）
Now here are the rules from the male side.（现在有了从男人角度所说的“规矩”）
These are our rules!Please note.. these are all numbered “1 “ON PURPOSE!（这些是我们的规矩。请注意。这些规矩故意排列成清一色的一号。）
1. Men are NOT mind readers.(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)（最重要的规矩：男人不会读心。）
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.We need it up, you need it down.You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.（女人应该学习放下抽水马桶座位，不要指望男人用完后帮你放下。）
1. Sunday sports or news, It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.（星期天的运动节目或新闻很重要，让男人去看）
1. Crying is blackmail.（哭泣是一种敲诈。）
1. Ask for what you want.Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! （需要什么直接清晰的说出来，不要指望男人懂得你的暗示。）
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.（每个问题都可以用“是”或“不是”来回答。）
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.（需要男人解决问题时再告诉男人你们的烦恼。需要同情时请找你们的女朋友。）
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
（吵架时不要提我们六个月前说的话。我们说的话七天后无效。）
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.（如果你觉得你胖那你很可能胖。不要问我。）
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
（如果我们说的话可以理解成两种意思，其中一种让你们难过或生气，我们指的其实是另外那种意思。）
1. You can either ask us to do something. Or tell us how you want it done.Not both.If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.（你可以叫我们去做某事，或者告诉我们你希望某事被做，但别两种说法同时使用。如果你已经知道该怎么做才最好，你就自己做。）
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.（如果可能的话，你最好在广告的时候再讲话。）
1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we.(库克船长不需要知道方向，我们也不需要。)
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.（所有男人只能辨识十六种颜色，就象电脑的默认设置。桃色（注：英文的桃子和桃色是同一个单词），是一种水果，不是一种色彩。南瓜（注：英文的南瓜和南瓜色是同一个单词））也是一种水果。我们不知道紫红色是什么颜色。
Finally , the guys’ side of the story.( I must admit, it’s pretty good.)We always hear ” the rules”
From the female side….（我们总听到从女人角度说起的“规矩”）
Now here are the rules from the male side.（现在有了从男人角度所说的“规矩”）
These are our rules!Please note.. these are all numbered “1 “ON PURPOSE!（这些是我们的规矩。请注意。这些规矩故意排列成清一色的一号。）
1. Men are NOT mind readers.(FIRST & FOREMOST RULE)（最重要的规矩：男人不会读心。）
1. Learn to work the toilet seat.You’re a big girl. If it’s up, put it down.We need it up, you need it down.You don’t hear us complaining about you leaving it down.（女人应该学习放下抽水马桶座位，不要指望男人用完后帮你放下。）
1. Sunday sports or news, It’s like the full moon or the changing of the tides. Let it be.（星期天的运动节目或新闻很重要，让男人去看）
1. Crying is blackmail.（哭泣是一种敲诈。）
1. Ask for what you want.Let us be clear on this one:Subtle hints do not work! Strong hints do not work! Obvious hints do not work! Just say it! （需要什么直接清晰的说出来，不要指望男人懂得你的暗示。）
1. Yes and No are perfectly acceptable answers to almost every question.（每个问题都可以用“是”或“不是”来回答。）
1. Come to us with a problem only if you want help solving it. That’s what we do. Sympathy is what your girlfriends are for.（需要男人解决问题时再告诉男人你们的烦恼。需要同情时请找你们的女朋友。）
1. Anything we said 6 months ago is inadmissible in an argument.In fact, all comments become Null and void after 7 Days.
（吵架时不要提我们六个月前说的话。我们说的话七天后无效。）
1. If you think you’re fat, you probably are. Don’t ask us.（如果你觉得你胖那你很可能胖。不要问我。）
1. If something we said can be interpreted two ways and one of the ways makes you sad or angry, we meant the other one
（如果我们说的话可以理解成两种意思，其中一种让你们难过或生气，我们指的其实是另外那种意思。）
1. You can either ask us to do something. Or tell us how you want it done.Not both.If you already know best how to do it , just do it yourself.（你可以叫我们去做某事，或者告诉我们你希望某事被做，但别两种说法同时使用。如果你已经知道该怎么做才最好，你就自己做。）
1. Whenever possible, Please say whatever you have to say during commercials.（如果可能的话，你最好在广告的时候再讲话。）
1. Captain Cook did NOT need directions and neither do we.(库克船长不需要知道方向，我们也不需要。)
1. ALL men see in only 16 colors, like Windows default settings. Peach, for example, is a fruit, not A color. Pumpkin is also a fruit. We have no idea what mauve is.（所有男人只能辨识十六种颜色，就象电脑的默认设置。桃色（注：英文的桃子和桃色是同一个单词），是一种水果，不是一种色彩。南瓜（注：英文的南瓜和南瓜色是同一个单词））也是一种水果。我们不知道紫红色是什么颜色。
