The Spark – a mother’s story of NUTURING GENIUS, by Kristine Barnett

In my opinion, the subtitle “a mother’s story of NURTURING GENIUS” is really misleading. Barnett is not trumpeting on how to nurture genius. On the contrary, the book is about the journey of a mother and her autistic son Jake (“Jacob”) reconnecting to each other, the commitment and unconditional support of a husband, the outcomes, and a whole lot more.

Like many parents of children with autism, Barnett and her husband had followed experts’ advice to a tee and provided Jake with numerous professional therapies every day. None of those therapies seemed to work. Her son remained in his own little world and was unresponsive to the outside world, including his parents. She was told by experts that her son would never learn to read or tie his shoes.

Against her husband’s will, Barnett followed her intuitions and removed Jake from special education and occupational therapies. Through keen observation and creativity, she surrounded Jake with what seemed to interest him which, in return, drew him out of his world. What happened afterwards were far beyond anyone’s imagination. Not only did Jake start to talk, respond and connect to people, his mind was so brilliant that it tops the scale for IQ test. His intelligence covers broad spectrum.

If Jake’s mind is amazingly stunning, what put me in awe is Barnett’s “community services” to others. Through the experiences she learned from and with Jake, she provided her experiences and services to help other autistic children and their parents above and beyond her ability, both physically and financially. Her compassion and creativity towards autistic children and their families are really inspiring. She and her family gave sacrificially. When the economy downturn hit, many had lost their jobs, and some even houses. Eventually, Barnett and her husband were also hit with unemployment. But when she and her husband were in dire need of a helping hand, hundreds showed up at their doorstep to reciprocate the loving care that they had ministered to others over the years.

Jake is brilliant but he is not cured of autism. Autism is a part of him and will always remain with him. While others marvel at Jake’s enormous intellectual abilities, Barnett continues acting as Jake’s best advocate. She constantly thinks and plans ahead and prepares Jake to handle different situations on his own emotionally. She reminds him to eat, bathe, and sleep whenever he is engrossed with his scientific theories. She realizes that when she, like other, starts marveling at Jack’s incompressible intellectual ability, she stops being his mother, which is her main role to him.

Barnett’s story is very inspiring and uplifting. Yet, when I was reading her story or when I contemplated on what she said, grief overflowed within me.

Barnett’s statement about employing a child’s interest to draw a child (an autistic child in this case) out of his or her world and teach them other things which they couldn’t seem to master, such as life’s basic skills, really strikes a chord with me. I believe that the opposite is also true – when you take away a child’s interests, the child would withdraw into his or her own little world, become emotionally detached and lose the innate desire to learn.

For many years I was like an octopus, lying inside a rigid box with all arms chopped off - one by one for venturing outside the box and to be fitted in. Barnett’s book makes me realize that I had lost my innate spark for learning.

Parents often don’t trust their children with finding their own path. They don’t want to do their children a disservice by not steering their offspring to the correct path. On many occasions, instead of shepherding their children, they take away what they don’t see fit and force their children to accept what they perceive as beneficial and promising, no matter how unreasonable or outlandish those things are.

Nonetheless, I am also a firm believer that a person should take responsibility of his or her life direction especially after he or she turned 18. (Why 18? I don’t know. It’s just an age I use.)

Knowledge doesn’t always produce wisdom. There are times knowledge only encourages behaviors, and behaviors are not equivalent to wisdom. The spark might have died. But this is my (your) life and I am (you are) the one responsible for rekindling and fueling that innate spark of learning - with discernment, that it.

CHILDREN LEARN WHAT THEY LIVE
Dorothy Law Nolte
If a child lives with criticism,
he learns to condemn.
If a child lives with hostility,
he learns to fight.
If a child lives with fear,
he learns to be apprehensive.
If a child lives with pity,
he learns to feel sorry for himself.
If a child lives with ridicule,
he learns to be shy.
If a child lives with jealousy,
he learns what envy is.
If a child lives with shame,
he learns to feel guilty.
If a child lives with encouragement,
he learns to be confident.
If a child lives with tolerance,
he learns to be patient.
If a child lives with praise,
he learns to be appreciative.
If a child lives with acceptance,
he learns to love.
If a child lives with approval,
he learns to like himself.
If a child lives with recognition,
he learns that it is good to have a goal.
If a child lives with sharing,
he learns about generosity.
If a child lives with honesty and fairness,
he learns what truth and justice are.
If a child lives with security,
he learns to have faith in himself and in those about him.
If a child lives with friendliness,
he learns that the world is a nice place in which to live.
If you live with serenity,
your child will live with peace of mind.
With what is your child living?

度娘不肯通过英文私函，诬赖我置网址= =我本想用中文重写，又进不了。
1）学术精英学校，依学术成绩录取
2）今年12，这是他初一的第一学期
3）pulling thingy, 你有曾对我吗
4）谢你的摘录诗，他选了jealousy - -
5）你又选了哪几项呢
应该就这些回复。我今天在2节课里写了个带moral msg 的短文（算是英文科的assessment ), 置我吧，你要读吗？